Intro

O full-orb'd moon, did but thy rays

Their last upon mine anguish gaze!

Beside this desk, at dead of night,

Oft have I watched to hail thy light:

Then, pensive friend! o'er book and scroll,

With soothing power, thy radiance stole!

In thy dear light, ah, might I climb,

Freely, some mountain height sublime,

Round mountain caves with spirits ride,

In thy mild haze o'er meadows glide,

And, purged from knowledge-fumes, renew

My spirit, in thy healing dew!

Goethe: Faust I.

Saturday, August 31, 2002

Alligators in the Psychic Sewers

there are alligators running around in these psychic sewers. i'm not where i think i am, and not even aware of whether or not this place is appealing or not. everyones got a gossamer accent, saying things that sound different than what would be written. i don't have strength to appease anything or anyone. i'm barely there to be selfish, and surely i should have plenty of motive for that. to speak negatively about someone else shows weakness. even if guised as assistance, advice, concern, caring, love, friendship, etc.

the pixies once again remedied a bout of The Malaise, but the next selection eased me back into alt.coffee contempt for new york nothingness. students just love their conversations. particularly the guys who have all night to say all sorts of things to some generous young femme willing to indulge academic borne freedom into obligation to benefactors and uttered ego full of insight.

without a young lady, i offer overpriced words. well, they're overpriced by my standards since i have to pay for them. if i don't get certain word, it seems like the best idea to go the wrong direction again.

not enough sleep to dream, and not enough solace to sleep. zhat's eating me,i wonder. it seems so unlikely that i actually get something that almost nobody else gets, but i believe i'm getting myself together even if my reference is the folks that don't get it. there are plenty of only living boys in new york i would bet you, if i had the money, which i do not. downtown is just no good with these fake haughty laugh at the joke to make it funny enterprises. don't get too worried, ladies, you'll find a man in no time. same thing goes for you dapper young fitchsters, you'll have a girl that fits right in, just right out of the catalogue.

we shall overcome? shall we then? am i a deserter? i couldn't finish the box of popsicles, so i _had_ to abandon them. i am not so much coward as i was too easily convinced to let it go, against my better judgment, too early in the morning i could excuse myself. i won't though. never a wasted frozen confection again, i will try.

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